20 Ways You Know You Went to/ Go To Big Walnut

1.) You've become a pro at staying in the middle of your walkway, because you know the second you slide over to the edge your entire shoulder is going to be torn to shreds by the walls. 

2.) You have grown used to random loud noises out of nowhere, due to the tri-monthly fire drills from shop accidents.

3.) You have considered yourself "rebellious" for wearing leggings to school. 

4.) You have to hesitate a second before addressing Mr. Felkey to avoid accidentally slipping and calling him "Flanders" or "Felk-dog".

5.) You've learned to embed yourself into a sea of people at school dances so you don't get suspended for putting your hands on your knees.

6.) You've sustained some fairly serious injuries from aggressively pushing people around during drumline.

7.) "John Lankford" is no longer just a person, but a genre of dance.

8.) You know you can get sent home and receive a detention for your shoulders showing but a kid can take his shirt off and hump the floor to Miley Cyrus in front of the entire school and receive no punishment.

9.) The words "Fulford" and "aliens" go hand in hand, no questions asked.

10.) You have a crush on someone with the last name of Ruark, either the teacher or the councelor depending on your gender and sexual orientation.

11.)  You can pretend all you want, if you didn't go to Souders you kind of wish you did. (Maybe a little biased, but no.)

12.) The epitome of your road rage happens within the parking lot of the high school.

13.) You could need a personal sized fan to prevent you from sweating through your shirt and a snowsuit to prevent frostbite in the same day depending on where you're at in the school.

14.) If the basement doesn't smell like formaldehyde, it smells bad in an entirely different way that you can't even place.

15.) You have wondered on more than one occasion if it's even sanitary to drink the water from the drinking fountain.

16.) The science lab in the basement, aka the smallest computer lab in the world, was one of the most dreaded places for your class to travel.

17.) You move more stealthily past the teacher on lunch line duty to exceed the 5 person limit than you would had you just robbed a bank.

18.) You have used every piece of furniture (booth, chair, couch) in the library as a bed at some point or another.

19.) It doesn't matter if your football team wins or loses every game, you'll still paint your entire body and cheer like hell.

20.) No matter how much you complain about it, you wouldn't have rather recieved your diploma from any other place. 

life story, i guess

So here you are again, crying on your floor to Taylor Swift and dumping sprinkles into your mouth after eating a bite of ice cream to achieve the perfect ratio. Here you are again, wondering what went so horribly wrong that you're sad and alone again. Here you are again, trying to convince yourself to pull yourself up just once more.

This time was different. He didn't just leave you or hurt you, he pretended you didn't exist. Like the last 4 months meant nothing. Like, because he was caught in a lie, the best way to salvage himself was to pretend like you were nothing. We were nothing. 

So my question is, how many people need to be involved for it to be a memory? Because I remember the way my insides lit up like the fourth of July when you complimented my mind, telling me I was brilliant. I remember the look on your face when you couldn't help yourself but to kiss me goodbye that Thursday night. I remember you telling me you wanted me, that we could be together, that I mattered. I remember pulling into my driveway at 1:42, twelve minutes late, and not caring about the trouble I could get into because I finally got to hold your face and kiss you. I remember you remembering that I put the pizza in the oven while it preheats. I remember pulling away 10 times before we finally stopped kissing each other. I remember you telling me that your mom asks who is making you smile so much when you're texting me. I remember being mad, telling you to make it easy on me and tell me I never mattered to you and you saying "I can't because that isn't true". I guess I got what I wished for. I never mattered to you.

But if those memories are only alive inside of me, are they there? That's what I need to know. Do you feel good about yourself, knowing you've thrown me aside because I was no longer convenient to you? Do you sleep soundly knowing that I'm tossing and turning, wondering if you're tossing and turning and wondering about me? Did I wear off?

I don't think I did. I think you can attempt to wash me off of you, I think you can attempt to rid yourself of me, but I still think you'll think of me. I think you don't want to, and I think you think if you push me far enough away (maybe that's why you blocked me on Instagram), you'll forget what we had. The chemistry we both admittedly felt. And that will make you feel more like a decent human being. Someone who doesn't set fires and then walk away as they burn. 

The memories are alive inside of me. No one has to believe them. No one has to vouch for you standing next to me during the fireworks, together beneath a sky on fire. No one else has to remember the feeling of finally kissing in a grocery store parking lot. No one has to understand the happiness I felt when everyone around that bonfire was trying to get you to be with me, and you saying you didn't know why you weren't. I suppose I can remember for the both of us. I'll continue to scroll through our conversations, starting 21 weeks ago when I told you to read Crime and Punishment and ending a couple of days ago when I was no longer crucial to your happiness. When I was no longer a convenience to you. I'll continue to wonder what I did wrong. 

But I need to remember, I did nothing wrong. I fell for a person who not only wasn't ready to catch me, but who was prepared to throw me off a cliff. And now, I have to remember to get back up. And remembering you will help me. I will remember the way my face lit up when you'd say something sweet to me. I will remember my heart skipping a beat and a half when you kissed me. I will remember the feeling of feeling wanted. And I will remind myself that if I stay here, shattered on the ground where you left me, I'll never find that with someone who deserves me. Who will make me light up but never let me fade out. Someone who will make my heart skip beats forever. Someone who will want me. Someone who will give me the most unadulterated happiness in the world, and make me the best and brightest version of myself. 

So I'll listen to crappy music and cry while I eat my body weight in snack foods, but not for long. I will pull myself up, and thank you for making me strong. For making me realize, yet again, I can overcome. I am better than what I've been given. And I will think about you and that will give me the strength to push forward. And I know that when it's 3am and you're all alone, you'll roll over and wish you could talk to me again. 

You Are Not Guaranteed

Tell people how you feel. Don't rely on them to make the first move. Tell the people you think are beautiful that you think they are beautiful. Ask that person that you've been wanting to get to know for a long time if they'd like to hang out. Kiss someone you've been wanting to kiss. We are temporary and so is everyone else around us. We can't keep putting things off because people leave and die and move on. Circumstances change, things get flipped upside down in the blink of an eye. Nothing is guaranteed.

Rejection is scary, and universally one of the biggest fears people have. Because what if that guy doesn't like you back? What if you tell that girl you think she's pretty and she laughs in your face? What if you ask her out and she says no? It is scary to put yourself out there, and the words "I like you" or "you're beautiful" can seem downright impossible to say. But say them anyway. Because you never know who needs to hear them.

But, something worse than rejection, is regret. Because what if he does like you back? What if you have been on unofficial terms for weeks and you're tired of wasting your time waiting so you finally say "hey, I'm into you" and he says "hey, I'm into you back"? What if you tell that girl you think she's pretty and she gives you her number and you get to know each other? What if it goes right? Regret is what happens when you don't even give yourself the chance to be rejected. You can't live in fear of things going wrong, but in the hopes of things going right. Life's too damn short to close yourself off of possibilities just because you might fail. Because you will fail. But if you don't give yourself a chance to fail, you also close yourself off of the possibility to succeed.

Tell her she's beautiful. Ask him to hang out. Apply for a job that you probably won't get. Learn from your mistakes. Tell someone that you want to hold their body against yours and kiss them until everything feels better. Tell someone that they're a beautiful human being and you're lucky to have the chance to know them. Live life without thinking of tomorrow, because tomorrow might never come. Stop with the ambiguity because we aren't permanent and we are not guaranteed. If you want to hang out with him, tweet him, text him, DM him and ask him to hang out. If you want to kiss her, grab her by the waist and do it. If you're lucky or happy or blessed to have someone in your life, make sure they know it. Because they won't be there forever.

Be risky. Put yourself out there. Respond to a text the second you receive it. Let the people you appreciate know you appreciate them. If you don't want to do something, don't do it.  If you'd rather sit at home with your family and play board games instead of going to that party, do it. Stop feeling obligated to do things. Take cool pictures. Explore neat places. Kiss the guy or the girl that you want to kiss. Be the person you want to be without any reservations. Fall in love with yourself. Be the kind of person you want others to be inspired by. Inspire yourself. We are wonderful. We are strong. We are experiencing the amazing gift of human consciousness. Someone not liking us back will not ruin us. The only person who can ruin you is you. Don't.

sex/love

Love isn't sex. Screw that. Sex is sex. Sex is slamming your bodies together for pleasure. Whether you're in love or not, sex is sex and love is love. 

Because love isn't that simple. Love isn't something that can be over in less than a minute. Love isn't something that even the grossest and smallest creatures of the world can do. Love isn't something you can create with a stranger when you're desperate and drunk. Love isn't something that can mean the world or mean absolutely notning like it's some sort of either/or. Love can't be a mistake. 

Love is the way your eyes inadvertently light up when you think about that person. Love is that smile that creeps on your face when you're laying in bed. Love is humming his favorite song in the shower and thinking of him until you fall asleep. Love is wanting to grab him and kiss him as the rain pours down and there's a hundred people around. Love isn't an accident. Love isn't a drunken mistake. Love is the most passionate and beautiful thing a person can experience. Not sex. Love. Because when it's with someone you love, anything is beautiful and passionate. Even sitting on different chairs and watching Law & Order together. Maybe that should be called making love, too. 

neverstøpthinking

Your body has walked through the toughest of times, battered by the apathetic mystery of life. It has held the hands of people who didn't deserve to trace the pattern of your palms, and held tightly people who didn't deserve to feel the warmth of your skin. It has fallen, it has gotten back up, it has broken and it has healed. But despite all of that, there's a person out there who will touch the skin that blankets your bones and make your insides light up like the Fourth of July.

Your heart has broken into a million pieces, shaken by the cruelty and unfortunate fate of other people. It has beat through even on the days you felt it would crumble beneath the unbeatable weight inside of it. But despite that, there is someone who carefully picks up the shattered pieces and makes it some semblance of whole again.

Your mind is a battlefield, filled with thoughts you believe no one else has had and ever will have. Your head might be torn between beliefs and theories never entertained that seem beautifully absurd. But one day someone will kiss it and twist their fingers through the hair on top of it.

And that makes me happy to be alive. 

9 Things You Can Tell Me That I Will Never Believe

1.) "I never had an awkward phase."

Bull crap. Maybe because I had such an extensive and painful awkward stage I get mad when people deny theirs, but I know you had one and deep down, you know it too. Stop lying to yourself. Embrace your sparky flair jeans and butterfly clips. Embrace them.

2.) "I'm about to leave."

You're in the shower, please stop lying to me. This text generally means "I'm going to leave within the next two hours."

3.) "My dick is 10+ inches long."

I mean first off, congratulations. I'm glad you are anatomically more inclined in your nether regions and I'm glad you define yourself as the size of your schlong. That said, I don't even believe you. I mean, that's almost a foot! You expect me to believe that? You show me a comparison picture that proves your statement, and I'll believe you. Your words aren't enough to get me to believe you have 10/12ths of a ruler stashed in your pants.

4.) "I don't like pizza."

Pizza is not a preference. It's not a "you like it or you don't like it" situation. It's a "you like it or I question your mental stability" situation. Really? You don't like pizza? Do you also not like baby puppies and soldier homecomings? Don't tell me you don't like pizza, tell a shrink. They'll figure out what to do with you. 

5.) "I'm single because... *insert anything except "a guy and I aren't currently sharing mutual romantic feelings"*"

You want to be single for summer. Guys take up your time. You want to find yourself. Honestly, that's a load of crap. We do this thing where we feel the need to justify a reason why we aren't in a relationship. Why isn't "I don't like anyone" a good enough answer, or more probable, "no one is currently interested in pursuing me"? The only reason I'll believe is that there's just no one for you to date, which is a more than okay answer! Maybe in some situations you have a different reason, but I probably won't believe you. 

6.) "I love running."

Maybe you love the feeling of accomplishment afterward, but I will not believe that you genuinely enjoy the act of running. And if by some means you convince me that you do, I won't trust you as a person. Anyone who enjoys uncontrollable sweat in your eyes and the feeling of being buried alive can't be trusted. I think we can all mutually agree that the results from running are favorable, but no one actually loves running. 

7.) "I don't masturbate." 

I don't know why we feel like this needs to be said. It's mostly girls who claim this, and I suppose you could be telling the truth, but most people aren't. It's not a bad thing! Exploring your own likes and dislikes is a positive thing! Women get so defensive when it comes to masturbation. It's not just a guy thing... Women do it too and it's okay! If you say this, you're either lying out of embarrassment or it's true and you're missing out on a harmless and enjoyable thing. Stop trying to convince people it doesn't happen. It's perfectly natural and acceptable. Love yourself and don't be embarrassed about it. Why is it okay for guys to openly talk and tweet about "rubbing one out" but girls hide the fact that it happens like it's the worst thing in the world. It's okay! Just do you girl.... Literally. No shame in your game. 

8.) "I believe everything the bible says."

First, I don't even think that's possible. Like you can't know and remember EVERYTHING the bible says. But I mean, in a less literal sense, I don't believe when people say that every belief they have is directly out of the Christian word. How would you live without exploring different mind sets or giving yourself the freedom to decide what you believe? The bible is a beautiful tool and sets some guidelines, but I can't believe that anyone is so okay with their personal beliefs all being written down in a book. You have to have your own opinions or conflicts with SOME things. I can't believe that some people believe everything they believe simply because they think they're supposed to. 

9. "Taking my bra off isn't the best part of my day."

Unless your bra is like, Dave Franco's hands holding your girls all day, I can't bring myself to believe you. There is nothing better than the feeling of taking your bra off. I could win the lottery and getting home and taking my bra off would be the best thing that happened that day. You can have tolerable bras, hell, you can even have comfortable bras, but in the end, there is nothing better than free-boobin'.

10 Things We Need To Stop Doing, High Schoolers

1.) Walking the wrong way in the hallway/stairwell.

Listen, I'm not saying we should install traffic signs and lights and hire police officers to patrol the hallways, but I am saying it would probably be beneficial. The hallway is split down the middle. There's an invisible line that, you would think at this point, everyone would aware of but apparently they aren't and it needs to be addressed. If you are walking one direction, walk on the half of the hallway where the other people walking that direction are going. Follow the flow of traffic. On the stairs, DO NOT TRY TO GO UP IN A SEA OF PEOPLE GOING DOWN. It's honestly not that difficult. Y'all need some damn moving violation tickets so you'll learn how to carry yourself down the hallway because next time I'm walking on the left side with other people traveling in the same direction as me and someone plows through opposing my force, I'm gonna ticket your sorry ass with my foot. Lastly, if you're on the right side of the hallway and you need to get to a classroom on the left, do not bolt through a pack of 37 people. Wait until there's a gap in traffic and then go. If you're holding up traffic on the other side, move over a little bit. Stand there with your hypothetical blinker on, do a hand signal if necessary, and wait to make your turn. You wouldn't just plow your car through a line of traffic, have the same courtesy for your peers. 

2.) Constant contact with your significant other.

I'm not talking about making out and inappropriate touching, although rest assured I will. But I'm talking about cradling each other on the stairs landing, or holding hands so no one can get around you. I promise, the 4 minutes you spend blocking traffic with your lover aren't strengthening your relationship. I have a hard enough time getting around ONE person, let alone two that are attached at the hip. I'm done with your crap, couples. I'm not bitter because I don't have someone's body to cradle in the hallway, I'm bitter because I have to take into consideration the traffic blocking couples when determining my route to class. Your connection will not, well, should not falter if you aren't physically touching each other for 4 minutes. I'm sure you missed your man during the gut wrenching hour you spent apart, but please, let go of each other and walk to class like two civilized human beings. 

3. It's negative 3 degrees out, please put some clothes on.

Guys aren't turned on by your butt cheeks hanging out of your skirt. They're probably concerned for your health and safety. It is below 0 degrees, ladies. Want to wear a skirt or dress? Let me introduce you to my friend tights! You are physically hurting me when I am walking into school bundled into 17 jackets and your entire anatomy is exposed to the air. Maybe you think you look sexy. Ya know what's not sexy? Exposure to hypothermia. Frostbite. Your sexy legs won't look so sexy detached from your body. My hands got about 4 seconds of air exposure whilst walking into school and I truly felt like death was desirable compared to it. How are you walking into school with 3/4ths of your body uncovered? Do you have a mother? Until this, the coldest winter we have ever had, ceases it's freezing wrath, I'm going to need you to put a weather appropriate outfit and if you're not okay with that just stay home. I'm cold just looking at you.

4) Other outfit concerns

I would say, for the most part, our student body does an okay job of dressing themselves. I'm not the fashion police, nor am I the epitome of great outfit choice. That said, I at least look like I'm prepared to head into public, kind of. Honestly, what is the point of pajama pants? Are sweatpants, the EXACT same thing as pajama pants, just not cutting it for you? I'm the first person to admit I've come to school looking like a just rolled out of bed, but are you actually just rolling out of your bed and leaving? Leggings shouldn't be banned, pajama pants should. Also, there are some people who need all of the points on their dressing license deducted for multiple offenses. Some people literally look like they blindfolded themselves and just dove into their closet, picked 4 articles of clothing and threw them on without looking. Do you guys own mirrors? I understand clothing is about self expression but what you're saying about yourself is "I'm an idiot". I know school sucks, but don't be dressed like you just played dress up at a 4th grade birthday party. And don't dress like you're a hooker. If you have a nice ass, show it off in ya yoga pants, girl. Work it. Big boobs? Drop a little cleavage. Nice legs? Wear a dress or skirt, weather permitting. Nice stomach? Tight shirt. But don't put all of that together. And don't extend the limits. You're getting an education, not laid. 

5) Walking speed to class.

There's two extremes here. The first is incredulously slow walking. Pick up the pace, people. 4 minutes is a fine amount of travel time without you guys. You're like getting stuck behind a farming implement on the street. Be it because you're sexing your boyfriend, pulling up your sagging pants or just because you feel like taking your time, but it needs to stop. I'm done passing people. The school does not have dotted yellow lines, it's a no passing zone. It's dangerous to go around, but I would rather risk getting plowed by opposing traffic than moseying around behind your slow ass. On the opposite side of the spectrum, SLOW DOWN! What is the hurry? At the very most, you're saving yourself 30 seconds of time. Are you that excited to be the first to your class? You are putting you and others in danger by taking a full sprint to class, blasting through everything and everyone in your path. I'm enjoying an average and enjoyable trek to class, but lo and behold Usain Bolt comes plowing through like a bat out of hell with all of his belongings and determination directed right toward you. I shouldn't fear for my safety at school, but there is nothing like the fear of a sprinting maniac coming at you full force so he or she can get to class 14 seconds earlier. This needs to end.

6) Parking Lot Etiquette 

Please slow down, guys. I mean seriously. People are walking, pulling out, and it's icy. I understand you're eager to get home or in a hurry to get to work, but  you are losing less than a minute of your time by slowing down and driving safely. Also, turn your music down. If I want to listen to your music, I'll download it onto my own phone to listen to it in MY car. I don't need to see your car about to erupt because the bass is dropping at ungodly volumes, and I truly fear for the future of your eardrums, seeing as I can't hear the music in my own car over yours. I'm sure you love your music and want to share your insightful musical taste with the rest of your class, but don't. Turn it down. Lastly, WHAT IS WITH PEOPLE THINKING ITS OKAY TO JUST STOP? (I understand sometimes your jackass friends think it's funny to stand in front of your car and hold you up. HA ha, now everyone BEHIND your friend is pissed and late to their destination because you have a terrible sense of humor.) But why are you stopping an entire flow of traffic to have a conversation with a friend? Text them! Not while driving, please. But the 47 cars behind you probably aren't too keen on being late to work, or having to sit and wait for you and your friend to plan tomorrow's festivities. Once you're out of your spot, go. Don't stop for anything except other cars and stop signs. I'm done.

7) Screaming in the hallways.

Oh my God, hey girl! Hey! Omg you look so good today, like so good I want to SLAP YOU IN THE FACE! Why are you screaming? Your volume is fifty shades of unnecessary. I cannot wrap my head around why you need to pull all of your bodily forces together to make a screeching yell to address your friend. Does she not have a phone? Does she have a restraining order on you that doesn't permit you to move within 10 feet of her? In that case, ya probably shouldn't be yelling at her. But you really need to keep it down. Being deaf because freshman girls need to salute their friend every time they lay eyes on each other seems less than desirable. Text them. Talk to them when you're not a mile away from each other. I don't want your screams anymore. 

8) Taking up bathroom mirror space
I understand sometimes you hair doesn't look the way it did in the morning when you're balls deep in the school day. I know you laughed so hard you cried and your mascara smeared. But I will buy all of you hand held mirrors before I walk into 40 people in the bathroom fixing themselves when I'm just trying to pee. Your friend can't wipe off the smeared mascara for you? You can't grab your phone and check the way your hair looks? Use whatever means necessary, but I'm trying to wash and dry my hands and I have to maze my way through the VS Fashion Show dressing room to grab a paper towel. Next time, I'm drying my hands in your hair and you can't stop me. The bathroom is for going to the bathroom. It isn't beauty school. If no one is in the bathroom and you want to check your hair, or check yourself out in a full body mirror, go for it. No shame in your game, girl. But as soon as you are interrupting the bathroom's intended purpose so you can reapply some eyeliner, I'm done. You're going to get kicked out. The piece of hair that fell out of your ponytail can wait. I shouldn't feel like I'm at a general admission's concert and the mirror is the main act when I enter the bathroom. I should be able to walk in, do my thing, wash and dry my hands and leave without bumping into 13 girls fixing their makeup. Heaven forbid your makeup doesn't look flawless, but I'm on a mission and I'm not going to let a pack of narcissists and their messed up hair slow me down.

9)Thinking people are jealous of us
I have nary been in an argument with another girl who didn't accuse me, at some point, of being jealous of her. Apparently, the only reason high school people don't like each other is because of jealousy. To be honest, isn't that kind of elitist of you? Maybe they have a good point, but you aren't willing to look at the aspects of yourself that could use work and you chalk up people's dislike of you because you're just better than them. I speak for myself here, but I don't think I've ever started an argument with someone because I was jealous of them. Annoyed, maybe, but not jealous. If I don't like you, I can absolutely PROMISE you that it isn't because I want to be you. I don't understand when this started, but it needs to stop. I've done it too. We all do. But when someone says "you're annoying" and the other person says "you're just jealous", it's like.... no, you're actually just annoying. Insults generally don't translate into jealousy. I didn't say your relationship is obnoxious because I am jealous that you're in a relationship. I said your relationship was obnoxious because your relationship is legitimately obnoxious. Jealousy is a go to because it makes us feel better, but like, stop. Take into consideration other people's insults. You better yourself from criticism. Not from chalking up animosity to jealousy.

10) Inappropriate touching/kissing

I would choose to see most ANYTHING over watching people make out. If I can literally see your tongues invading each other's mouth, that's enough. WHY are you doing that during school? You look like you're making an, albeit, poorly funded porn and you're doing it in public! How do you feel comfortable doing that in front of your teachers? I don't need to see this. I've come to get a solid education, not a sexual education. I can't see why you find it necessary to play an aggressive game of tonsil hockey betwixt classes. SEVEN HOURS! That's how long you have to go without making out! I don't care what you do once you've left school, but please, let's aim to make the hallways a porn free zone. I already dread coming to school, and seeing you sucking face in the hallway doesn't make it any better. Also, touching has become something of a problem. Look, I don't know what it is about a math equation that makes you wanna fondle your boyfriend's ballsack during class, but if you could refrain from doing so, it would go beyond greatly appreciated. Stop hovering your hand around her V-palace, stop groping his inner thigh. I truly believe you are able to go an hour without intimate contact with one another, and if you can't, let your sex addicts anonymous group witness it and not your poor high school peers. I don't know why this is even an issue but get your ratchet hands off each other's genitals and learn a thing or too, ya nasties. I didn't come to school to watch you run the bases with your significant other. Your educational facility isn't the place to grope each other. I don't have a problem with you groping each other, I just don't want to see it. And rest assured, no one else wants to see it.